What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Why do people believe that global warming is man made?

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

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Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Where Seattle Mariners stand in All-Star voting - Seattle Sports

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Scoop: Treasury officials defend "revenge tax" from wary GOP senators - Axios

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Make Nazis afraid again!

Nicholas Galitzine Says Masters of the Universe Has Wrapped Production - Variety

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

There's a new blood test for Alzheimer's. Here's everything you need to know about it. - Live Science

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Is LGBTQ destroying the world?

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

‘It Is Going to Happen’: JPMorgan CEO Jamie Dimon Warns of Crack in the Bond Market - Barron's

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Should You Do Cardio or Weights First? We Finally Have an Answer. - ScienceAlert

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

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Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Can you name a female actress who has had bad timing or luck in her film career?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!